the time suck that was my weekend

This past weekend I went on a mini-vacay with my mom and sister. We stayed one night in the Tawas Bay Beach Resort (not sure if you can classify spiders in the shower and a constant smell of smoke in the room a resort, but whatever).

After a long day of driving we were going to go down to the hotel bar, drink yummy, beachy beverages and watch our fellow guests make fools of themselves at karaoke.

Sadly, we never made because of a little Web site called Texts From Last Night.

My mom, sister and I spent nearly three hours reading through these drunk text messages people post. Talk about a giant time suck, but once you start it’s really hard to stop.

We could have had a great time and sent a few texts of our own, but nevertheless we were in tears and could not pull ourselves away. I mean here is a Web site that combines two of my favorite activities, drinking and texting – although doing one with other is NOT recommended.

Here are a few less raunchy but still funny texts :

(919): I’m ashamed of what I did for a Klondike bar. (this one was my mom’s fav)

(908): ur plase or mine? lol
(1-908): well if you don’t learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I’ll be at mine.

(864): weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.

(209): update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
(1-209): the house was on fire??
(209): shit I thought I told you.

Do I think these are all real? No idea. Don’t really care either. Although, you can’t make some of this stuff up. Just sayin’.

The best (worst?) part is they update pretty regularly so you can just waste more time with this awesome nonsense.

Ughh, what has my life come to? Oh well, enjoy!

Note: I said I was reading this with my mom. Thought it would be weird, but she found it extremely funny and wasn’t weird at all (she’s pretty cool like that). But if your parents aren’t as cool as she is, I would highly recommend not reading this with your parents.

crazy girls have all the fun (and get all the guys)

It baffles me. It really does. Why do guys love crazy chicks?

Oh right, she’s hot, sexy and it really doesn’t matter that she’s on eight different meds, throws up every meal and has severe emotional problems.

I ran across this article via Twitter the other day, and it really got me thinking. Why are men attracted to hot, crazy chicas? Just because they’re hot? And it makes things a little more “exciting and interesting”?

Because it’ll be really exciting when she’s stalking your house and tries to murder you in your sleep (exaggeration? probably, but I’m sure its happened more than once). I get that she’s HOTT (because you can’t be ugly and crazy, that combo will get you nowhere), but doesn’t the crazy override the hottness?

Apparently, guys don’t want a normal, attractive woman who has a good head on her shoulders and won’t fly off the handle at a moments notice. We can’t just be fun, smart and attractive anymore. We have to be fun, smart, attractive and crazy in order to keep a man interested.

No, thank you. If I have to fly into an emotional fit every night to keep a man’s attention, I’d rather be alone.

Now, all girls (and guys), no matter how normal they seem to be, have their own brand of crazy, and occasionally it can come out. And yes, it’s sometimes it’s fun to act a little insane, but why on earth would you want to date someone who can’t keep it together?

So guys, if there are any of you reading and there probably aren’t many of you, please answer me this: Why do you love crazy girls?

xoxo, your future self

Inspired by an article on College Candy, I’ve decided to write some advice to my 16 year-old self because well, it’ll be fun, and I don’t have anything better to do, like pack…

Dear Katelyn,

You may find this letter a little harsh, but consider it tough love. That being said, here is some advice from the older, wiser and cuter version of you.

1. Put AAA in your speed dial. You’re gonna need it more than you think. (one day you’ll have a sweet car and name it Alice).
2. You will learn how to get to Wal-Mart and many other places. It’s ok, directions just aren’t your thing.
3. Dying your hair dark was the best idea you’ve ever had. Go you.
4. YOU ARE NOT EMO. So please stop dressing like it (especially the piece of fabric with the safety pins in it, it’s not cool).
5. Self-cut bangs are a bad idea.
6. You’re still a bit of a chunker. Sorry.
7. No worries, you’ll find what you love to do.
8. School dances are overrated, as are having dates for them.
9. Tan before prom. PLEASE. That whole dark hair with the pasty skin really doesn’t work as well as you think.
10. Talk more. You’re too quiet.
11. High school will never be what you think it is, but college will be. Just wait.
12. It doesn’t matter what the people in high school think of you. You’ll never see them again.
13. Kent State is the way to go even if it is your Dad’s idea.
14. Listen to your mother – she is almost always right.
15. Live, learn, love.

See you in six years.

xoxo,
your future self

if you’re happy and you know it

…you will get a boyfriend (or girlfriend)!

Congrats, being happy with yourself and your life will get you a significant other. It’s a proven fact, well proven in the fact that currently being unhappy in your life hasn’t rewarded you with that significant other that you so desperately want.

I’ve recently run across another single, 20-something’s blog, and she discussed the same phenomena. You can’t find someone to fall in love with until you fall in love with yourself. Because why would someone love you if you can’t even love yourself?

Being with someone simply because you don’t want to be alone will lead to being with someone who probably doesn’t truly love and respect you because you don’t truly love and respect yourself (this is the rule, there may be exceptions, but remember those are rare and few and far between).

Not to mention, are you truly happy?

To me, happiness is about finding yourself and what you want out of life. It’s different for everyone.

So my unsolicited advice is: Find what makes you happy, and love will come when it knows you’re ready for it.

oh where, oh where has my paycheck gone?

Oh, there’s part of it…

Juicy Couture bracelets from Rue La La

and another hefty chunk…

Juicy Couture purse from juicycouture.com

and the last little bit (they were only $12.99! how was I supposed to pass that up?).

these little gems are from Target

Obviously, I love to shop. Especially online. With just a few clicks of a button I can get anything from shoes to DVDs to food. And they get me to buy, buy, buy with irresistible sales.

Stores make it way to easy to shop online nowadays. I get e-mails from Juicy Couture, Urban Outfitters, Aldo, Express and DSW. Not to mention these intivation-only boutiques like Rue La La. It has AMAZING sales! I got those Juicy bracelets from almost 50 percent off (e-mail me if you want an invite).

Now that I’m working full-time this summer, I have more money than I’ve ever had, and this is what I’ve been spending it on instead of saving for a rainy day (sorry mom!).

why i like the single life

Yes ladies, I said I liked it!

This is a relatively new realization. I never used to like being single. I used to be the girl who was always down on myself saying “why don’t I have someone? I’m fun, and I deserve someone too!”

At lunch today, my friend Gayl and I were discussing our love lives (or lack thereof), and I realized that I really like being single. I don’t just tolerate it, I actually enjoy it.

Here are a few reasons to why (just in case you think I’m nuts):

1. I have awesome friends and family. Relationships take time, a LOT of time. Time away from my amazing friends and family is something that I’m just not willing to give up at the moment.
   

   my friends and i celebrating Obama's victory

2. I love my freedom. I like being able to do whatever I want, whenever I want. I don’t have to call someone to tell them what I’m doing (until I move back in with mom…ughh). I get to meet and flirt with anyone I want without feeling guilty. It’s freaking awesome.
3. I love not worrying. Not worrying about what he’s up to or why he’s not calling me back. I used to make myself so upset worrying about him that I forgot to think about me.
4. I’m young! I’m only 22 and have so many things I want to do still and don’t want to be held back because of a boyfriend.
5. I haven’t found the right person yet. This isn’t really a reason why I like being single, but it’s why I’ve chosen stay that way. If I really wanted to have a relationship, I could have one (despite my dripping sarcasm and the fact that I jiggle pretty much everywhere). I would rather find someone I’m excited about rather than settle for someone I’m really just not into.

Just to clarify, I don’t hate relationships or men. I want to find the right person. I want to get married one day and live happily ever after, but I’m not going to settle for the wrong person just because I don’t want to be alone.

I realize relationships are about compromise, and one day I know I’ll find the right person, who I’ll be willing to compromise for. But while I’m waiting for him to show up, I’m enjoying my life and being single.

a flaw that i quite enjoy

Hi, my name is Katelyn, and I have road rage.

Yes, I am the driver you see making unnecessary (and sometimes obscene) hand gestures at unsuspecting drivers who have no idea what I’m yelling.

And you know what? I love it. This is one flaw  – can you call it a flaw if you like it about yourself? – that I quite enjoy. It makes me feel good to yell and curse at someone I’ll never have to see again, especially when they’ve just cut me off on the freeway (and I start off with a thank you, motherf#@$er). It alleviates stress, the yelling does.

couldn't find one of me yelling, but here's a nice pic of the calm before the storm.

Most people who have driven with me will tell you that this quality isn’t one of my finest. My friend, Big Deb, actually is a little scared of me when my rage comes out. But I just tell her that it’s my way of driving, and she just has to get over it.

It’s not like I’m going to pull the person over and punch them in the face (this actually happened to my driver’s ed teacher, true story. She told us about it while teaching us why to not have road rage). I just yell at them and make myself look like an idiot.

Now, I’m not saying I’m a perfect driver. I’m definitely not. This is one stereotype I probably fit. And when I do something wrong or stupid, I expect people to yell, scream and honk. There’s no hypocritical road rage going on here.

So if you see me in my 2006 blue Civic acting like douche driver, please let me know.

This is one of my favorite flaws, what are yours?

one great way to secure a jobless future

Having an internship is one of the best opportunities a young professional (or soon-to-be professional) can have. It can be mundane and boring at times, but that’s the life of an intern.

As an intern myself, I’ve learned to take every project handed to me with a smile, even if it sucks (although I haven’t really gotten any of those yet).

Unfortunately, some people think they’re bigger and better than they are and go and do something like this:

This open letter was submitted by Jenavi Kasper, who recently resigned as an intern at one of the large local ad agencies:

Dear Local Advertising Agency Named After the Founders,

Well, it’s been one heck of a time interning over at your super-cool office. The Friday in-house happy hour was a great touch. When I landed the internship at your place I was excited. Working downtown in a hip office, getting some experience in the industry and the free beer is what lured me in. It sounded like a dream! And I have to say, when I told people where I was interning they were pretty impressed.

But you guys dropped the ball (figuratively of course). Come to think of it, while I was there I never did see anyone start the pick-up game of basketball I was expecting to break out at any moment–but maybe I was tainted by the YouTube video. (What good is the basketball hoop in the office if nobody uses it?)

I would be crazy to leave, right? Even if it was an unpaid internship it’s still a resumè builder.

But, if you can believe it, I left this experience disappointed.

Maybe that’s my fault. I had unrealistic expectations. I thought that interning would allow me to use my brain and maybe, just maybe, apply some of what I spent four years learning. But you proved me wrong. You have snatched my naiveté like a pillowcase filled with candy on Halloween.

The funny thing is, I didn’t get it right away. When you assigned me to organize the pens by color on my first day I didn’t worry much about it. When you asked me to drop off DVDs to your client’s office, I didn’t think twice (though I wasn’t paid for gas). I didn’t even mind when you asked me to help you move binders out of your office.

But it started to get old fast. When “helping with projections” meant reading you numbers off a spreadsheet I became a little discouraged. When “working with scripts” meant retyping scripts I was bummed. It was especially painful when I spent all morning cleaning out an office for the new girl while you guys took off to Starbucks.

It wasn’t all bad. You did let me go to that commercial shoot, which was fun, and it was great to be able to sit in on a couple of meetings. But there are some things you should keep in mind before you bring in my replacement:

Remember, we are ADVERTISING students. That stuff you do for your clients to get the word out, the get the brand promise out to the target audience, we know how to do that too. We also know those Jedi mind tricks.

We want to learn as much about the business as possible and if you can’t provide that training we will find someplace else that will. That place might be your competition.

Or heck, we’ll freelance and become your competition.

So be careful. You don’t want to end up being called out on a blog, do you?

Yours Truly,
The Intern

You had to sort a few pens? So what? Everyone does things they don’t want to do. Grow up and realize this is the real world, and everyone starts at the bottom.

I hope this girl knows she’ll never get a job now. She’s a crisis communications risk that any business would be stupid to take. Just ask Crisisblogger.

For all you future and current interns, this is one great way to secure a jobless future.

mind your thank yous

I believe in the power of thank yous. To me, a simple thank you is one of the best ways to make a person feel good.

I say thank you to just about everyone and everything, even in situations when it really isn’t required.

• Waitress fills my water glass. Thank you.
• Professor hands me a test. Thank you.
• I get an assignment at my internship. Thank you.
• Someone cuts me off on the freeway. Thank you.
• I do something for someone. They say thank you. I say thank you for saying thank you.

Ok, maybe that’s a little over the top, but nevertheless I appreciate people who thank me.

I’m lucky enough to work at a place where everyone says thank you. It’s a real mood lifter and confidence booster.

So don’t forget to thank the people around you. It can really mean a lot.

Now, I’d just like to say, thank you for reading.